my thoughts expressed in words


Dictionary defines it as

‘being brave, calm and uncomplaining when you experience something unpleasant or painful’

Wow !!!  quite succinctly defined. But theres so  much to read between the words. so  much to absorb.  So much to implement. Not an easy task…..But ONE HAS TO… its need of the hour. To stay calm, we need to tell or rather dictate our own mind and repeatedly auto suggest that we need to be brave.We need to  think about the people, kids around us who look upon us for moral support and for their sake keep calm.  To act sensibily, with a distant vision, we need to stay calm. By being calm one can avoid lots of last minute confusions. One just needs to be prepared, equipped, and alert. This is the time to probably take a few deep breaths and sit down with your eyes closed for a few minutes and focus on the supreme power and pray to be beside you to handle the situation. With God above and faith within, we will be able to.

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My instant energy pill !!!!!

There is Reason

For every pain that we must bear,

For every burden, every care

There is a reason.

For every grief that crushes our heart

For every scalding tear we shed,

There is a reason.

For every hurt, for every plight,

For every lonely, painful night,

There is a reason.

Yet, if we trust God, as we all must,

It can turn to be for our good.




Swami Chinmayananda


Melting Point !!!!!!

Hey……………Your guess is wrong ! You would have thought i am going to write something about how u start melting in this chennai heat!!! Yes, u really melt down literally.. People have already started telling me that i have shed weight !!!!!No need to visit any gym or go on a diet and sweat out doing exercises…You just need to stay in Chennai during April and May months of the year.Isn’t it really easy to shed the extra kilos this way…

But…this is not about that at all.. Its about one thing that melts in your mouth. I have been tasting it fo the past twenty one years and its just the same. All these years my mom in law has made it several times, but the taste  remains the same. The consistency is just the right. Previously my mom in law used to make it single handedly.. Now for the past fifteen years, she is constantly monitored, criticized, assisted, intervened , counselled by my dad in law….He needs to keep himself busy after he took his VRS fifteen years back ! There are always those expert comments from him that she should have fried the besan a little more, or the ghee is too much, or she should have removed it from fire a ‘few’ seconds back… But beyond all this it tastes great. I tried doing it under the able guidance of my respected mom in law, in the sense, she will be constantly by my side and i would be doing the stirring part of it ( i dont call this doing independently)!But somehow i myself was not very satisfied. So i decided to sit back and enjoy it … My husband loves it. If it is made when he is at home, he will be waiting for the pieces to be made. and when it is still hot, some half a dozen pieces will rush through his food pipe and silently rest in his stomach blessing the hand that made it ! My daughters love it too..They too sit and watch its gaining shape.. Once it is transfered into a plate, it disappears.My mom who is in bed, makes a big fuss to have her food, but when given a piece, her mouth is wide open. !!! We are so much used to the one made by my mom in law, that we just dont enjoy what the whole word praises—the ones thats available in the shops.

By now you must have guessed that it is the ‘MYSORE PAK’ … a traditional south indian sweet …….It just melllllllllllts in your mouth.




I used to write letters to you frequently after i got married and settled down in mumbai.. but gradually letter writing dimnished and phone calls took over.But i still cherish the letters that you wrote to me. So just thought of writing to you today. Your letters carried loads of advice as to how i should ‘adjust’ in the new family, how i should ‘earn’ a good name etc., etc., After saying all this, you always added

“I know i need not tell you all this as you are a good girl”

I used to read the letter patiently to read this last line which showed the enormous faith you had in me. I lived by your words. I did not find it difficult to adjust in the new family and entertain all the family members because i have never seen you uncomfortable with dad’s family! I accepted to my mom in law that i dont know much cooking because i have seen you asking guidance from my paternal aunts ! I was in complete understanding with my husband because I have never seen you and dad fight for something. You may have had differences of opinion but one of you always compromised. That’s what I thought was the secret of your successful marriage which was a wonderful journey of togetherness for twenty six years!The next thing I adore about you and appa is your friends circle. We always had people visiting us in our house. Amma I am proud to tell you that I have imbibed that quality from you both and have a huuuuuuge circle of friends and well wishers.

I was an apple of the eye for you both..(or more for my father!!! ???). Just kidding amma, I know you both loved me equally and it was the toughest question to be answered in my childhood whether i am dad’s pet or your’s. But since you were a teacher, your academic expectations from me were more…. I still remember the thrashings i had had from you and how appa used to calm u down and plead with me to be more attentive when u are teaching me…But he used to forget all this when it comes to discipline of keeping things in its place, or table ettiquets.. how he used to scold me….But nothing has gone waste. I still can find things in its place, and eat very neatly !!!

You were were particular that i should make a career, take up a job and ‘stand on my own feet’..Oh my goodness, how i have made fun of that statement as to ‘even now i am standing on my own feet”…amma, i didnt really understand at that age as to how important it is. Some how your leaving me back with the maid and going to work had a bad impact in my mind and i just didn’t want to do the same to my kids. Anyways, no regrets amma… I am happy !

Now we were friends… I still can’t forget the day appa was diagnosed of throat cancer and I came up and told you that you should share everything with me and we will face it together. I knew I had a big responsibility of taking care of your mental state. We fought it…all the three of us. You were very strong. At those times I have never seen you shedding tears and feeling gloomy.When i finished college and got married, you had full faith in your son in law that he will come  up in life from what he was on that day. Hats off to your predictions amma. You always wanted to visit places and go on pilgrimage. But somewhere this did not work out for you. Gradually your health deteriorated. But you still managed to do things on your own. You have been very positive and down to earth. Though your health worsened in the last five years, you are still cheerful at times when you are energetic.

If only you were healthy, i am sure you would have learnt all about computer, e mails, blogs and contributed a lot ….

Your health condition does  not permit you to sit and read this. But i am sure you would have appreciated me if you had.

I love  you amma for all that you taught me in life…….