my thoughts expressed in words


We sat for lunch today…me, amma and appa  The person from the refrigeration company  comes for the AMC of the fridge, I leave the table and guide him to the kitchen after collectively wondering how there was no call from the company taking a prior appointment….. after a brief time with the technician i turned around for something and saw amma (who had left the table and her food half way… )at the entrance of the kitchen.

I understood her concern of my being alone with this  sudden visitor.. This is not intrusion… If people just think for  a second before framing opinions, we can avoid all misunderstandings. Elders in the house have their own way of supervising us. Its not ‘barging into our privacy’. Its the concern, care that they have for us. Our children learn from us how to be amicable with elders at home. Our behaviour will assure us how we will be treated during the sunset period of our life.. Won’t we take it in the right sense, if the same is done by our mom and dad…..

Yes, I was having lunch with my in-laws!!!!!

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Maiden Visit………….

She was a tiny, timid, pretty girl.Her mother – a young lady in her late twenties was pretty too.. The mother was trying to coax, cajole, bribe, admonish her daughter. She was trying to explain how comfortable it would be, how trendy it would look, how her teacher and friends would appreciate her for that. She started feeling helpless at one point that she looked around and sought a nod of approval from the onlookers. But the daughter would not budge… she was screaming… Some threw glances of disturbance, some found it funny, some felt nostalgic and with  a smile thought   about how they had handled this same situation in their life[ I was thinking how my daughters never made a fuss for this] some offered help, but nothing worked. The poor mother did not know that this situation will change in life, down a few years, the daughter will definitely be assertive in her choices. Later on there will be many such situations where the mother will again be coaxing, cajoling and bribing just for the daughter to give her an ear. This repeats with every woman …..

The tiny timid, pretty girl  was a toddler who had started schooling and had come for a hair cut on her maiden visit to the beauty salon !!!!!!!!!!!!

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The Nonagenarian of our family…..

People compliment me about how practical i am, how i go through rough patches with a smile, how i am filled with energy, etc., etc.,………no i am not blowing my own trumpet…. was trying to tell from where n whom i acquired these qualities…

My grandmother has passed the genes to me i suppose. Everytime i meet her, i learn something from her. She is good heart, compassion, love, unconditional love, patience, practicality, personified. The moment somebody enters her house, she will greet them with the world’s widest toothless grin… you become comfortable within minutes. The next minute, the lady vanishes inside and comes back with a glass of piping hot filter coffee. She then settles down for a chat with you. She misses not a single detail about your family members and gestures her blessings when u say that all are fine. Again a wide grin… It rubs on you shortly and you are all smiles too when talking to her. She insists that you have food at her place before leaving. If you call her for a photo shoot, she combs her hair with her palms, takes a peep into the mirror to see if the religious mark in her forehead is clear, if not, she adjusts it applying it again and then presses the pleats of her saree with her hand and turns around and says ‘I am ready’. Its not the craze for photograph, the message that you need to be immaculate at any time of the day.I have never seen her shabby and dull.

She lives in a pretty old fashioned house, which obviously does not have all the facilities that a modern house has. But she does her bit in keeping it clean. The way she works in her kitchen is laudable. No wastage, no messing up of things. It goes without saying that the food she prepares is the yummiest on earth. It has to be, as its loaded with love, the secret ingredient. Once she finishes her work, she reads magazines, plays cards by herself, plays an age old game called ‘PALLANKUZHI’ which  her mother has given her. Its a wooden board with seven pits on either side of the board. We need to have shells to fill it and with good calculation we can sweep all the shells of our opponent. She is always good at swindling the opponents shells….!!!!. She plays chinese checkers alone, and always manages to retain one coin in the middle. [The tip she gives to my daughters is that they need to patiently move the coins and should not be in a hurry] Isn’t that life’s greatest tip……moving the coin patiently and not to scurry.

She may not have graduated in any of the top universities, but she knows everything that they don’t teach in any of the university. In one of my recent visits, i was asking her, about her relationship with my grandfather. She said that she had her quota of misunderstandings too but preferred to keep quiet to keep the marriage and the relationship going. She belongs to a different generation altogether. Today’s girls and boys may not vouch her statement. But at the same time, when today’s boy  or girl  talks about incompatibility at the drop of the hat, I just think about her !!!

She is ever ready to forgive any one who has hurt her. A quality which we need to develop. To forgive and move ahead is not easy, but gives u lot of inner strength when done.

She is all smiles when she is with her great grand daughters. You can see the pride in her face when my daughters hug her and keep meddling her  shrunk skin….

When she places her hand on my head and blesses me I  literally feel the energy gushing through my cells.

On this day when she is celebrating her 97th birthday as per the hindu almanac,I dedicate this note to her  and pray to God to give her good health.[I don’t think she needs anything else at this stage !!!]  I keep telling my husband that we need to celebrate her 100th birthday in a nice way. Let’s wait for the day.



When i started detangling the bundle of wool that i had purchased to make a baby blanket for a friend of mine, i realized so many qualities we need to / or we already possess..

We dont get perturbed by the complications life throws at us. We get a jerk when we approach, but give our best in finding a solution.. My bundle of wool was quite a tangle, but i knew i have to remove it to make balls of it. Isn’t it the same…?

Once i started winding it in my fingers, i felt the confidence in me that i can definitely do it… The wool did not run smooth for very long, there was a knot ….. its the same with life, its not a cake walk always………hurdles are bound to be there…

By this time, i had made a small ball out of the wool wound in my fingers… when i encountered a knot in the bigger bundle, i passed the small ball through the skeins and took it out for another stretch of smooth running yarn…isn’t life’s situation the same…its never storm always…. there is definitely a lull period… we need to quickly re charge ourselves …..

I realized the enormous patience one needs to have in both the detangling of wool and approaching the ups and downs of life…

When patiently passing the woolen ball through the skeins with a smile on my lips, I was already in my mind visualizing the sweet outcome of the effort…a cute, cuddly baby blanket

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